Proverbs 10:18 Hatred and slander_

“He who conceals hatred has lying lips, And he who spreads slander is a fool.” Proverbs‬ ‭10:18‬ ‭NASB‬‬

Hatred is a strong emotion. The Hebrew carries the meaning, “exceedingly hateful.” It is directed at another person. A deep unhappiness or disgust caused by that person. When I dislike something, I usually acknowledge it and go on my way. But hatred is fixated on resolving itself in some sort of action. Lying lips are simply the cloak of secrecy in which hatred is working out its intentions.

Slander is malicious, false, and defamatory. It’s an effort to hurt another with something that is made up, murky, or dark.

Hating something is not the problem. Maintaining it is. From a smoldering anger or a festering wound springs behavior that not only hurts the other, but ironically, it hurts the hater just as much. Hatred is not wrong or avoidable. There are things we truly hate. But how we resolve the hatred or live with it is the important thing. We need help. That’s why concealing it becomes a problem.

As I review others who write about this proverb, I read self-righteous sounding comments such as: “Both vices must one day be known and punished, and hence their folly.” There are occasions when I am wronged. Someone not only does something bad to me, but personifies something opposite of my character in the process. To me, it’s not a matter of simply choosing to not hate something any longer. That’s often not an option. But when one hurts me, choosing forgiveness resolves it. When one defrauds me, seeking justice helps resolve it.

Earlier in verse 12 he says:

Hatred stirreth up strifes, but over all transgressions love throweth a covering. (Emphasized Bible)

Choosing love is much more effective than hate. But choosing love costs me something. It doesn’t require me to bury my head in the sand, but it helps me to resolve the interpersonal tension that would eat me alive and make me into something that I do not want to be otherwise. Who is perfect and can do this without help? We have an advocate! The Holy Spirit that dwells inside of me is my counselor and help. And my Father has many in the body of Christ that can come along side of me to bring wisdom to resolve the issue. When wronged, rather than nurturing and hiding a growing hatred then leaking slander as a symptom, I will cover with love, seek help, and move on.