Proverbs 12:15 I am right, idiot! Do you hear me?

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man is he who listens to counsel. Proverbs 12:15 NASB

This is a particularly painful proverb for me this morning as I grapple with some persistent missteps at work. I feel like such a fool! I have so many blind spots in my own life. My dreams last night were like a movie running in my head of all of the failures I’ve experienced in a particular circumstance over the past several years, yet at the time, I marched ahead as though there was no other way to approach the situation. Yet, I didn’t know what I didn’t know. So reading this proverb this morning reminds me of the fine line I live between foolishness and wisdom. It’s not always black and white.

This may sound elementary, but as a human I live based on my own perspective and experiences in life. This sounds like a “duh” moment, but the key words are “my own.” Which means there are others. My own point of view is one of many. The way I live and choices I make are not only based on that perspective, but also on the premise that I am acting on a pure motive. That my intentions are noble and I may trust them. But do good intentions justify my behavior, any behavior? “The way of a fool seems right in his own eyes.” Recognizing that I will always consider my view right, how could I possibly be better informed? And this is the crux of the Proverb. Advice. I must listen to it.

I need a deeper sense of humility and a persistent recognition that “blind spots” are just that — I don’t see them. If I approach circumstances knowing I only have part of the picture, I will spend more time trying to understand why you and others think the way you do and not react emotionally or defensively. I want to double my efforts to love and respect others even if I don’t agree and possibly even find their behavior offensive. They too have blind spots. I am not a fool for my differences, but rather, for my unilateral, overconfident, non-negotiable judgement of what is right or wrong — particularly when my opinions are forged in the absence of information. When I bring a spirit of collaboration and understanding to a conversation, I am equipped with tools that help me achieve better results. Relationships. Trust. But without them, differences escalate to conflict which escalates to incompatibility, then alienation, and often worse — elimination and murder. This sounds dramatic, but in reality I kill someone as soon as I intentionally cease to acknowledge them further — or I dehumanize them to something “different” than me.

My blindness doesn’t make me a fool, but my intransigence does. The heart of the fool is that of narrowness, limited perspective, quick judgement before all sides have expressed their perspective. Foolishness is magnified when I make decisions based on that limited view, when I put in motion something that is insensitive, damaging, hurtful, and ignorant… and I could go on. Foolishness has no end to its effect. At its core, it elevates my way above another’s even though in the other person’s eyes, their way is just as valid. What a sticky mess!

It’s a core value and goal in my life to reflect the image and likeness of my Father. To be transformed internally to look like Him externally in my behavior. While I am on this journey, I accept that I will discover (many) foolish things in my thinking. My own “right-ness.” So today I invite wisdom and pray that when I step on the scales measuring the wise and the fool, I tip in the right direction.

Counsel

I love Solomon’s remedy: counsel. The Hebrew interprets it as advice and some translate it designs, schemes, strategies. The idea is that there is purpose, collaboration, and ideas that come together to bring the best possible outcome. I find it interesting that of all creatures on earth, man has the unique requirement to learn, to be taught how to do something. And I find that in the very act of learning I may show my love for our Creator. The fact that I am teachable, open to wisdom and counsel, and have a heart that wants to do the right thing says something about my values and who I am. And it’s a predictor of who I will become.

Following this thinking further, look at the many sources our wise teacher gives us — for example, this morning I’m meditating in Proverbs. He is a wise and wonderful counselor. He has gifted us with teachers. And He has given us a promise that if any lack wisdom we simply need to ask for it and He gives it liberally. I have many “counselors” at my disposal. Consider these few: 

The counsel of circumstances (or fruitfulness)

When I shoot a basketball, the swoosh through the hoop tells me whether my aim is on or off. When I grow flowers in my garden, the full blooms tell me when I have the soil, sunlight, and supply just right. When my car careens off the road or into another vehicle, the sound of twisted metal tells me something has gone wrong. Life, and the good or bad that comes from it, is communicating something to me constantly. Let my circumstances speak to me.

The counsel of the Holy Spirit

There are so many benefits to being filled with and influenced by the Holy Spirit — a quick read of John 14-16 and I am so heartened by what my Father gives me in His infilling presence. The Spirit of Jesus within is the ultimate “Wonderful Counselor.” (Is 9:6)

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. John14:26 NASB

The counsel of friends and others

When I read “listens to counsel” the first fulfillment in my mind is another person who is in the role of a trained counselor, consultant, or advisor. Although I don’t believe people are our only source, they are possibly Solomon’s intended target and an incredible resource. The body of Christ, my family, those close to me, all speak wisdom and counsel into my life. But I must ask for input, be open to it, recognize it for the gift that it is even when it’s hard to hear.

The disposition of listening to counsel — no matter the source — invites wisdom. Even so, I am thankful that Jesus is the author and finisher of my faith. He’s the one that wants to speak to me and fellowship with me. It’s when I recognize and hear his voice in prayer, in others, in circumstances, and in natural results, that I find real counsel.

Everyone thinks their own way is right. Get over it. But not everyone will listen. Today, I choose counsel over vindication.